The Top 13 Superhero Vehicles

Throughout all the movies and TV shows we get a great deal of exposure to the superheroes and the cities they live in.  What we don’t always get to appreciate is what gets them from point A to point B...their vehicles.  I have to admit, with the low salaries of some of these characters, or seemingly no income at all (where does Mr. Fantastic get the money for all that cool stuff?) I sometimes wonder how they can afford to build, gas-up, and insure these vehicles.  No matter how they do it, I confess that I want one of each.

I realize that I normally do Top 10 lists, but there are so many cool vehicles that I had to boost it to 13 (because the Batmobiles take up 3 spots).  I hope you enjoy them all.

Here is The Comic Whisperer’s Top 13 Superhero Vehicles.  The list is in no particular order.

13.)  SR-71 Blackbird:  Yes, the baby bird that takes the X-Men wherever they want to go.  Especially if they want to get there in a hurry, unseen, and looking stylish.  With all the right looks for a mutant world saving mission or maybe just taking it for a spin the SR-71 rounds out the Top 13 list.

12.)  The SHIELD Helicarrier:  One of the scenes that really blew me away in Captain America:  The Winter Soldier was when they were showing off the Helicarriers.  Absolutely amazing computer generated graphics.  I have to admit, I don’t own a pilot’s license nor do I know anyone who does, but this would be cool to have even just to drive you car on and do donuts in the clouds.  But I digress.  This floating fortress is the size of my hometown and has the capacity to carry most of an army, or kind-of contain the Hulk.  The best part?  You never have to worry about having a flat tire.

11.)  The Punisher’s GTO:  For readers 30 and below this car may not mean a great deal to you.  Let me assure you, however, that this is one of the all time classic muscle cars.  It has the loud, rumbling engine, rear wheel drive and a staggering 10 miles to the gallon.  This car with the killer paint job, and a Doomsday feel, makes this car #11 on the list.  My advice?  If the Punisher asks how you voted, I’d tell him you thought it should be #1.  I’ll take the heat for you.

10.)  Ghostbuster ECTO - 1:  Loosely defined, the Ghostbusters are a true blue set of superheroes.    This 1959 Cadillac/ECTO-1 is a true icon in movie history and sports enough space to carry all that equipment and the backpack thingys that they use to catch ghosts.  I’d buy one of these in a heartbeat.

69.)  The Fantasticar:  This people mover has had many iterations with the most recent one being the best.  Featuring a photon accelerator and an ion generator for propulsion, three cockpits, a bullet proof exterior and, well, it can fly.  I will reserve my opinion of the cast, the movie, and pathetic storylines for another blog.

8.)  The Original Batmobile:  This list could be littered with Batmobiles alone.  I don’t know how many iterations there were of the Batmobile, but I can think of 5 off the top of my head.  Based around a Lincoln Futura Show Car, some of its lines are meant to look like a Mako Shark.  Tell me if I miss anything, but this car has lasers, rockets, a Batphone, radar, a Bat-tering Ram, a Batcomputer, a smoke emitter, a rear facing camera, a police beacon, two parachutes, a voice control Batmobile Relay Unit, and the Bat-Ray.  I wonder if they were options or if they came standard on this car.

7.)  The Tim Burton Batmobile:  Get used to these because this one won’t be the last Batmobile on the list.  It certainly helps to be a billionaire, doesn’t it Bruce?  This beauty has a fully functioning gas turbine, two Browning machine guns, a grappling hook, a Batdisc Ejector, smoke emitters, oil slick guns and bulletproof shielding.  Don’t forget about it’s ability to jettison it’s sides and become a Batmissle (or whatever it’s called, its got to be “Bat” something...)  I’m not sure if I should drive it or hang it on my wall.  This bad boy is a true work of art.

6.)  The Hellcycle:  This was one of the saving graces of the Ghost Rider movies.  Frankly, if the special effects weren’t so good these movies would have been complete garbage.  This tank of a bike is a 12 foot long half-bone, half-metal bike that looks good with or without the fire.  The ability of this bike goes beyond that of any Batmobile.  This baby can leap long distances and come out of nowhere, it can ride up buildings, bomb it over water, and stays lit the whole time.  The producer of Ghost Rider said, and I quote, the bike is “the epitome of how fun hell can be.”  

5.)  The Red Mist Mobile:  Largely overlooked in the vehicle category, just like the movie which was largely overlooked in the entertainment category, this car rocks.  This suped-up Mustang is looking slick...unlike the driver.  It’s got sat-nav, an iPhone hookup, mood lighting, a rear-view camera, and it’s got...well...the mist.  The ability to squirt water out of its bonnet had to be an add-on. The only drawback?  You have to stop every block and a half to fill up your gas tank and water for the mist which makes it a lousy getaway car.

4.)  The Herkimer Battle Jitney:  Who could forget this little number from Mystery Men?  It has a giant electro-nuclear magnet, and several tonnes of villainy-squashing awesomeness.  Honestly, this contraption is probably the most non-lethal thing on the road.  I’d bet against it in a fight against a Pinto.  Frankly, it looks like it doesn’t handle very well either, or corner, or parallel park and it’s probably got low trade-in value.

3.)  Captain Nemo’s Otto Mobile:  This ranks up there as my favorite car in this list.  Just look at the style and metalwork on this thing.  No, it doesn’t have the gadgets or ejector seats some of the others have, but it does have a trick up it’s tailpipe.  Nemo can track it remotely, allowing it to serve as the beacon he needs to fire his missiles accurately.  Actually, that’s pretty useless except for very rare scenarios, so forget I revealed that one.  My only question is how does that thing steer with four wheels up front?  Although it’s my favorite I’d need to take it for a test drive before I applied for financing.

2.)   The Black Beauty:  Remember this lovely little piece of mechanical death?  The Green Hornet invested in all the right gimmicks when he put together this beautiful car.  It has a GM Performance ZZ454 500 hp crate motor and Race Trans Turbo 400 manual valve body transmission.  I know it’s a fact but I have no clue if all of that is good or bad.  Weapons-wise there are mini-guns that pop out of the hood, it has suicide doors with 12-Guage AR-15 machine guns, an m2 flamethrower in the front grill, 12 front and rear stinger missiles, giant spikes that come out of the wheels, and all the bulletproofing one could want.  If it had a luggage rack to carry all of the dead bodies it would be perfect.

1.)  The Tumbler/The Batpod:  It hurts me to do so, but I have to add one more Batmobile.  This may be the best of them all.  A prototype military vehicle, this baby is meant to leap over otherwise unbridgeable gaps.  The designer said he was going for “a cross between a Lamborghini and a tank”.  If you think the Batpod is awesome you’ll love the Tumbler.  It can travel through office block corridors, flip around lampposts, and scoot up walls.  It’s a two-in-one deal that any self respecting male should have parked in his driveway.

This list is far from complete.  It left off goodies like the motorcycle that Wolverine took from Cyclops and the Optimus Prime tractor trailer truck.  In the end it’s all in what you like and what you would love sent to you as a birthday gift.

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Amazed and Frustrated

I must admit I am amazed and frustrated about something that I shouldn't be.  Before we go into that let me tell you a quick story.

When I was a boy I sat with my dad in a bank loan officer's office when he was "applying" for a car loan.  The conversation went something like this:

"So, Pete, how much did you need and what were you going to buy?"

"I need a loan for a car and I need $x,xxx financed to get the car."

"I'll have it done for you this afternoon.  I'll call you."

(papers are signed, they stand up and shake hands, my dad and I leave)

A HANDSHAKE GOT HIM A CAR LOAN.

Granted, this was a long time ago, and this wouldn't be possible today due to the amount of garbage people try to get away with today, but this set my moral and ethical compass.  When you shake hands your word is your bond.  When you shake hands you follow through.  When you give your word you keep it...no matter what.

When my son got into the buying, selling and appraising of comics with me I told him the golden rule in this business:  don't ever, for any reason, deliberately cheat someone out of money.  Ever.  It's the honest, ethical and moral way to run a business.  There is one exception.  If you are buying a comic, on the spur of the moment at a flea market, garage sale, etc., and you honestly don't know the value, paying the asking price is fair game.  An example is my wife buying an obscure comic I didn't recognize and asking me if $1 was a good price.  It was in good shape, had a name I didn't recognize, and I couldn't imagine it being worth anything, so I told her it looked good.  When we got it home we found the value to be $200 in the shape it was in.  I don't feel as though we cheated anyone.  That was a week ago.

Cut to yesterday.

My son and I went to a flea market in 80 degree heat to search out some good deals on comic books.  While making our rounds we came across a kind gentleman who was not selling comics, but was selling superhero action figures.

"Do you ever sell comic books?", I said.

"No.  I have boxes and boxes of them but I never bring them along?", he replied.

I introduced my son and I and gave him our card.

"We buy, sell and appraise comic books.  Is that something you would be interested in?", I said hoping for the best.

"Absolutely!  I'll give you a call and we can see what the value is of some of the comics I have.", he said.  He actually seemed genuinely excited!

"Can I ask you your opinion on something?"  he said hesitantly.

"Sure."

"I had the comic book with the first appearance of Ant-Man."

(As an aside, he is referring to Tales to Astonish #27)

He continued.

"I sold it the other day for $350, did I do the right thing?"

Now this is a question with no good answer for a couple of reasons.  First, I have no idea what condition the comic was in.  Second, this comic is of extreme value because it was the first appearance of a major character.  Third, it's old and rare and I don't know how many would be available at this point in collector condition.  I only knew what the approximate value was in Near Mint condition off the top of my head, but I couldn't bring myself to say it.

In Near Mint condition that comic is valued at $20,000.  Chances are it wasn't Near Mint just because the older the comic the less likely it is to be Near Mint because comics weren't necessarily coveted in those days and people didn't store them well.  Still, $20,000?  Ugh.  This guy is super nice, what do I say?

In my silence my son spoke.

"You made the buyer very happy.  You did the right thing for him."

The answer wasn't perfect, but it was the truth.  But do we share the value of the comic with him.  If he's reading this he knows (and I am really, really sorry).

What many will say is that the comic could have been in extremely poor condition, maybe even falling apart, and probably wasn't even close to $20,000.  That's very true.  However, according to Comic Book Realm (which is a site I absolutely love!) even in reprehensible condition, I mean flat out crappy with creases and tears and rusted staples, it's valued at $600.  Even at a rating of .5 out of 10, which is where a sneeze could vaporize the comic, it's valued at $100.

Now you're going to say, "Well, a comic is only worth what someone will pay for it."  Um, yeah, and I can tell you that any moderate to serious collector would buy this comic because of it's incredible value.  I would.

So, how to you view this?  Do we feel sorry for the seller?  I do.  Some may say that he should have done more research before he sold it and I agree.  But the real question to me is what did the buyer know?  Did they know the value or didn't they?  Did they see the comic, guess it might be old, and offer $350 in an act of pure honest ignorance?  I don't think so.  I'm going to guess that the buyer bought it knowing full well the worth and ran all the way home to tell his friends or, even worse, tried to sell it on eBay for $30,000 (trust me, I've seen it done).

Yes, I'm making an assumption.  The buyer could not have known just like I didn't know about the comic my wife bought.  But we're talking Ant-Man, my wife bought one of those "risque" comics, with actual nudity in it, so there's really no comparison.  Did the buyer not know who Ant-Man was? not likely.  Marvel has been pounding the release of this movie now for months.  You can't walk 10 feet without tripping over a sign for the movie.  They knew.

So, is the buyer at fault for taking this poor man to the cleaners or is the seller at fault for not doing their homework.  I would say both have equal responsibility in this transaction, but I would also say that the kind gentleman seemed happy with the deal.  So, who am I to trample on his happiness?

I let the words my son said be the final say in the matter.  Thankfully the topic changed when his son said, "I have a mint condition Amazing Spider-Man with the first appearance of the Punisher, how much is that worth?"  The answer is about $1,300 in Near Mint (any collector worth his salt knows this is Amazing Spider-Man #129).

I told him it was around $1,300 but I would have to see it.  I could see in his face the sheer delight at what he had.  He should be proud, there are a ton of people that would pay the asking price for that comic.  Not only is Spider-Man huge, but the Punisher has made more than one movie appearance himself and has hundreds of comics with him in them.

The bottom line is simple.  Get you comics appraised, know what you have, and get what they are worth.  I am very happy, and I mean it, that the gentleman was happy with the sale.  In reality that's all that matters.  Would he have been much happier with a couple thousand?  Probably.

Me?  I'm amazed and frustrated because I think he was deliberately taken by the buyer.  I can only hope that the kind gentleman has some incredible sales days at the flea markets because he deserves to make that money.